In retrospect, I see the reason I didn't get it is,
I didn't want it bad enough. I had other priorities.
I just wanted to get the word right on the page and get
the pages out to readers. Not have a career as a writer.
Not publish books. Not be somebody. Not have a reputation.
Who is he? Where did he come from? Does he know how to act?
Will he embarrass the list? Will he fit in our operation?
Is he a troublemaker? Hard to deal with?
Does he have a writer personality?
Is he recalcitrant and intractable?
Fuck him. Who needs that?
What does he think he is?
The Oracle of Delphi?