One weekend my mom watched Owen and Balder
and Brenda and I drove over to Tarpon Springs
for a mail art conference. This is the one where we met
T. B. McGee and the woman he was with and John Pyros
and his fiancée. The one where I read in a mall and nobody came.
We stayed in the Gondolier Motel and ate at Pappas's.
We had fun. Once you have kids, a trip like that is like
a vacation. I'm on vacation here at the house, writing
GULF COAST STORIES. I'm thinking about changing the name
to FLORIDA WRITER: THE ONE LEFT OUT OF THE YEAR-END ROUND-UPS
OF WHO IS THE FLORIDA WRITER? WHAT IS THE FLORIDA NOVEL?
The Florida novel is a book about what that feels like. I am qualified to write it.
But will it have an audience? Catching Bigfoot isn't much of a platform if it's
yourself you catch. It sounds like bragging. It sounds like boasting.
Selling wolftickets. I ain't jiving. I am the man, I suffered, I was there.
I wanted to write a book like Alex Shoumatoff's Florida Ramble.
I wanted to write a book like Harry Crews's Florida Frenzy.
I wanted to write The Book Lover's Guide to Florida.
A book I was left out of. Keep it in the family.
Stick with your friends. A Florida cracker will make do.
Will get by on grits and grunts. A banana pudding for dessert.
Maybe it's a cookbook. The Cracker Table.
The Cracker Chair. The armrests ate off
by flop sweat.