Diary

Friday, February 25 (cont'd)

Q: What time is it?

A: 0530 hours.

Q: What day is it?

A: Thursday.

I have decided to do my maid work Friday morning. Maybe take in a matinee Friday afternoon.

Q: All work and no play make Jack a dull boy.

A: Brenda and I go to The Red Bar every Sunday.

Q: A man needs some time to himself.

A: That's the main difference. I have some time to myself.

I don't feel under such time emergency.

Q: Chief was the head of the Anthropology Department at FSU. Right?

A: Yes. We went on a dig with him at Port St. Joe.

Emerson called Thoreau the Captain of a Huckleberry Party.

Chief organized scalloping expeditions in St. Joe Bay, after work.

We'd collect coqina for a broth.

The whole idea of a dig was to get away from wives and schedules and to cook sumptuous meals. He let the students cook their specialties. But mainly he cooked.

Turkeys, hams, standing rib roasts. We made sandwiches out of leftovers.

Q: What did you cook?

A: I made conch chowder out of left-handed whelk.

Brenda made a carrot cake.

Oh, yea, besides the carrot cake last Sunday at The Red Bar, Ron Cliburn got up and sang "Putty Knife Blues."

Q: He's between houses you know.

A: I don't have it that bad.

Q: Do you get many telephone solicitors at the house.

A: Yes, and spam for cheap prescription drugs, home equity loans, and penis enlargers.

Q: Ah, the Internet.

A: It's useful for research. And communication.

Yesterday morning I posted a reminiscence of Hunter S. Thompson at The Daily Bulletin and last night a man asked me if I was really the wino on the Muskie campaign train.

He said the wino on the Muskie campaign train was his favorite Thompson character.

Q: Did you confess you were an impostor? You've never taken Igobaine.

A: Yes. But once I gave Blaster Al my Press badge and he went to a book fair, or a folk art exposition in Baltimore, as Jack Saunders.

That's an old mail art tradition. Using many aliases, using other people's names.

Blaster Al wrote a book as Crowbar and I wrote the introduction as Blaster Al.

My Date with Bob Black.

Q: What did Crowbar do?

A: Went on a date with Bob Black.

From: Jack Saunders
To: Patrick Simonelli
Subj: Cover Art

I'll take a crack at writing 2 or 3 tight summary paragraphs for the back cover.

If you don't use Bryan's art for the cover, I'll use it for POSTCARDS FROM POINT AND SHOOT.

If it's an integral part of the book, it will have to be used. That is, I'll write a book around the cover, rather than the reverse.
If you do use it, I'll commission another painting from Bryan and give him more time.

I'm having Christopher M. print up more copies of Root Doctor, so I'll be able to sell CDs at my book table, and see my old swinette-picker dream come true. I'll also have a reason to drive to Panacea, to call on Tattered Pages bookstore and espresso bar in Crawfordville.

From: Jack Saunders
To: Bryan Hand
Subj: Cover Art

My publisher says,

I like the Black Lagoon art piece, but i'm undecided about using it on the cover. I've sent it around to get some unbiased feedback.

The image has a strangely hypnotic quality. It's funny, eye-catching, and appropriate to you. My biggest question mark is the confusion factor. I'm not sure what the average guy on the street would think after seeing the title "BUKOWSKI NEVER DID THIS," with the Black Lagoon artwork & a white haired man underwater! Ha, i guess Bukowski never did that either. It's very funny.

I'll keep you posted.

Charles Bukowski is the ultimate underground writer success story. John Martin gave him an allowance to quit his job at the post office and write a novel, Post Office, which became a huge success in Europe. Bukowski toured Europe, with a personal paparazzo, Michael Montfort, to document it, and wrote a book called Shakespeare Never Did This. He was still largely unknown in the United States, where he's better known for the movie he wrote about himself, Barfly, than for his many novels and books of poetry.

Most underground writers think if they only had a publisher like Black Sparrow Press they would be Bukowski.

One of the things Bukowski wrote about was going ten rounds with Hemingway. Art Brew writes about going ten rounds with Bukowski, in Bukowski Never Did This.

What did Brew do? He wrote the book while working at a full-time job, being a good husband and a father and a son, and maintaining a voluminous correspondence.

And now it's published.

Bukowski also never rescued Miss Weekiwachee from the Creature From the Black Lagoon. In a gimme cap with an anatomically correct boar hog on the front.